Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

It's long, it's so long... How long have I been here? When does it end? complained my backside while I watched this.

Sshhh, said I, concentrating on Keira Knightly. God, I can't take you anywhere, can I?

Short review: Did I enjoy it? Yes. It's fun, has lots of laughs, great action pieces and is a good ending to the series (if it is the end). I think I'd have enjoyed it more if I'd re-watched Dead Man's Chest before watching this, since there's a lot of continuity and carried forward plot points.

Longer review: You know me, I'm a nitpicker with films. I did enjoy this, but it gets hard to follow in parts and it did descend into Jason and the Argonauts territory near the end. You'll know what I mean when you see it. There's a lot of stuff that's great, there's a few things which aren't. It's one main weakness is the cross and double crosses going on makes it a little harder to follow that I would have preferred for a fantasy action film, and things change so fast it can be a bit of an effort to keep up at times.

The scene with Jack in a hellish Davy Jones' Locker is superb. I've never seen a better way to show hell, even though it technically isn't.

The naval battle was a big let down though, it seems that when the British lose their flagship, even though they still out number the enemy 3-1, they always retreat. Even more annoying was that Endeavour would have torn the Pearl and Dutchman a new one, since it still outguns both ships combined.

Even at 163 minutes, there are parts of this film that feel rushed. However, there's no part that drags, which is good. The problem is, with its length and adding in adverts and trailers, by the time you leave, you've spent three hours in the cinema. So trust me, go somewhere with comfortable seating.

Overall it's a good film that probably would have been better if Dead Man's Chest had been more memorable, so I could remember what happened in it.

Score: C. I know, I know, shocking score. But I still think the first one is the best of the three.

OQ: And so, we will go to war!

Spider-man 3

After some of the reviews I've read, I was a little nervous about going to this at the cinema. But I persuaded myself with the notion that its either this or lie in bed all day.

I've been told that Kirsten Dunst is really annoying in this. I didn't find this. Everyone said she sulks for most of the movie. Well, wouldn't you? You get fired, your boyfriend keeps going on about how great you are while being a little bit self absorbed and you end up in a crummy job waiting tables. I think her character motivation made perfect sense

No. Two things really annoyed me about Spidey 3 and neither of them was the Dunst. The first was Stan Lee's hammy cameo. "You know, I guess one man can make a difference. Well, goodbye." Oh sweet jesus! It's not enough that they kept repeating that line all through the first and second movies, they have to hammer it home again? If I'd been eating popcorn at the time, I would have started throwing it at the screen. The second was Dr Connors. First he's a physicist, yet after ten seconds examination says the venom material is a symbiote and feed on aggressive feelings. Secondly, he as much as admits its from outer space. Now if it was me, I'd be jumping from the desks, dancing down the corridor and singing the "I'm going to be famous!" song. But no, he just runs tests on it and eventually destroys it in acid.

Now that the bad stuff is out of the way, on to the good stuff.

I liked the film. It's true the villains aren't quite up to the standard of the first two films, which is possibly why you have three of them in this film. Sandman is brilliantly conceived and very sympathetic. His genesis scene is fantastic to watch. Venom is, as already mentioned by others, dealt with very poorly. He arrives with a wet splooge and leaves with a bubbly whimper. Harry Osbourn as the new goblin is a bit weak.

J Jonah Jameson is a hoot. His "time for your pill" sequence is comedy gold.

Overall, I didn't feel the film dragged, as some reported. And after having two days to re-analyse it, I still like the film and have the same opinion about the various good/bad bits, which is something of a unique selling point for me. Normally I change my mind about three hours after seeing a movie. I think that the script could have used some additional work, just to give it a little extra fizzle. It's slow to start (not a bad thing), but it wanders a lot in the middle. A faster opening, straight into combat and dropping the MJ storyline would have helped. But then we'd be complaining that MJ was sidelined and only a bit part character, wouldn't we?

So, does it beat a good lie in on a Saturday? Yes. It's well worth seeing, and if it is to be the end of the series, it's a good ending. Would it beat a good lie in with Kirsten Dunst?

Score: C+ It's an entertaining film, a few annoyances, but gets dragged up a half point for Bruce Campbell's restaurant bit, and a small boost for having the Pirates of the Caribbean 3 trailer beforehand.